289 - Sprayt to Video

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You recklessly unscrew the gas cap and reveal the fuel filler neck as fast as you can, without even the faintest hint of caution.

A hot spray of fuel erupts from the filler pipe, covering you with a light mist of scalding gasoline.

"Ahh!" you scream. "I am feeling so injured!"

The back of your right palm flies toward your forehead as if drawn by a powerful magnet and you flop onto the concrete in an exaggerated swoon. Once on the ground, you tear your hand from your face and turn your eyes to the camera.

"If only I had used the caution as the instructions on the fuel cap clearly stated," you explain robotically for future viewers of the "Getting Gas and 12 Other Ways To Die" instructional VHS tape, "then I would not have been one of the six people that die centennially from fuel spray-related injury complications. Oh, regret!"

Fifty dollars well earned.