Welcome to my evil archives! All of my dailies are listed here, latest to earliest. Simply click on the story title to go to that story's page. I like some of my stories better than others. Stories I like best are marked with a * because humans love to make stuff fit into neat little boxes like that. Enjoy!
Volume Two: Signs of Distress
- 540 - You Are Welcome
- 539 - Wanted
- 538- Lifeguard*
- 537 - Trauma Room
- 536 - Don't Fear the Fin
- 535 - D-questrian
- 534 - Diagrannelid
- 533 - Tie Down Here
- 532 - Bold Flavors
- 531 - Flee
- 530 - Harmful if Swallowed
- 529 - Poop Who's Who
- 528 - Thank You! Please Call Again
- 527 - Reserved for Employee of the Month
- 526 - MIss You All :)
- 525 - Boxing (Diagraming)
- 524 - Please Do Not Drive on Sidewalk
- 523 - We Don't Discriminate
- 522 - Beach Trolly
- 521 - Sales of Art to Minors
- 520 - Savings Inside
- 519 - No Solicitors
- 518 - Got HItch-hikers?
- 517 - Watch Your Step
- 516 - Safe Place
- 515 - Escalator (Diagrama)
- 514 - Custom T-Shirts
- 513 - Fire Exit
- 512 - A Taco A Day
- 511 - We Have Your Back-To-School Cash
- 510 - Trust Us with Your Comfort
- 509 - Please Remove Hat and Sunglasses
- 508 - Snowcone
- 507 - Caution Dangerous Limb
- 506 - No Skateboards
- 505 - Please Leave Extra Towels For.
- 504 - There is Hope
- 503 - Taproom Hours
- 502 - STOP TRAFFIC
- 501 - Pets are not allowed in bathroom
- 500 - Fire Exit
- 499 - Keep America Beautiful
- 498 - Now Serving Pizza and Daiquiris
- 497 - No One Is Permitted
- 496 - Shuffleboard Champion
- 495 - Explosives Licensing
- 494 - Please Check In
- 493 - No Climbling or Playing Near Cables
- 492 - Handicapped Ramp
- 491 - House Rules
- 490 - Do Not Touch This Thermostat
- 489 - {Indecipherable}
- 488 - Safety Matches
- 487 - Don't Get Scurvy
- 486 - So you want free margaritas?
- 485 - 00 09
- 484 - Girls Only
- 483 - KAWK
- 482 - Preservation
- 481 - No Touch
- 480 - No Drinks Beyond This Point
- 479 - Overhead Door
- 478 - Press Start to Kill (Diagrama)
- 477 - Fresh Oil
- 476 - CONTACT PRECAUSTIONS
- 475 - Access to Star Dressing Room
- 474 - The Key to Happiness
- 473 - Official Lamp Adjusting Station
- 472 - Live Fiddler Crabs
- 471 - PLEASE CLEAN UP
- 470 - Police Lingo
- 469 - 24 Hour A Day Video Surveillance
- 468 - Fall Prevention
- 467 - Proper HAnd-Washing
- 466 - Don't Forget the Jameson
- 465 - Night Light
- 464 - Evacuation Plan
- 463 - URInAds
- 462 - BEWARE
- 461 - ZA BRA
- 460 - Elevator Keys
- 459 - Main Control
- 458 - Dean of Students
- 457 - Smoking In Designated Area Only
- 456 - Taste Something Fun
- 455 - Fresh Air Intake
- 454 - Hand Rails and Snap Chains (Diagrama)
- 453 - Trespassers Will Be Eaten
- 452 - Caution Marker
- 451 - Push To Exit
- 450 - baby
- 449 - Do Not Turn Machine Off
- 448 - Student Driver*
- 447 - Hippies Use Back Door
- 446 - Good One
- 445 - TANKS
- 444 - No Standing On The Bench Damnit!
- 443 - Impress Your Guests
- 442 - No Weapons
- 441 - Dance First, Think Later
- 440 - BoBBi ENTROPY
- 439 - NO TRESPASSING*
- 438 - ELE
- 437 - Commitment to Excellence
- 436 - Be Polite
- 435 - Watch for Wires
- 434 - Shoplifters
- 433 - No Refunds
- 432 - C C >
- 431 - Customer Parking for Estimates (Car Trouble)
- 430 - Reading This Means You Are About That Life
- 429 - Mississippi Blood Service
- 428 - Do Not Back Up (On This Dick)*
- 427 - I don't have to like Bush
- 426 - live, love DEMONS*
- 425 - Donut Queen
- 424 - Milan Lounge Eggs
- 423 - The Old U.S. Mint (The Feedback Rises)*
- 422 - $1000 FINE
- 421 - Fort St. Charles
- 420 - Don't Listen to Brett Newski
- 419 - Horascope $5.00
- 418 - Do Not Climb On Fence
- 417 - We Close Saterdy
- 416 - Mantrap
- 415 - Personal Security Devices*
- 414 - Emergency Shut-Off
- 413 - Slow Down Kids Playing
- 412 - Welcome Golfers
- 411 - Reserved Until 10 Minutes After Showtime
- 410 - More Diagram
- 409 - Please Cover Your Food
- 408 - Grab Something Good
- 407 - 8
- 406 - Ring Master
- 405 - Safety First
- 404 - Special
- 403 - No Parking 1-14-17
- 402 - No Glass Containers
- 401 - Drink Dat* NOTE: I have no memory of writing this due to substance abuse. Beware.
- 400 - Pussyfooters
- 399 - Contains Up To 10% Ethanol
- 398 - Don't Dump!
- 397 - Booze ->
- 396 - Pictograph Security Systems
- 395 - Homer's All-Purpose Bucket
- 394 - Please No Toilet Paper
- 393 - Do Not Play With This Computer
- 392 - You're at the Center
- 391 - Do Not Insert Any Part of the Body
- 390 - Gasboy
- 389 - nutritious snacks
- 388 - Name Your Cups + Water Bottles*
- 387 - Get a Flu Shot
- 386 - Free Kittens
- 385 - Take All of Your Food Home
- 384 - Keep In
- 383 - Mall Responder
- 382 - No Parking In Red Zone*
- 381 - Do Not Shoot My Trees*
- 380 - Father Forgive Them
- 379 - Attention Officers
- 378 - NIROSTA*
- 377 - Diagram*
- 376 - PULL*
- 375 - Prepay Inside Please
- 374 - Po-Boy Times*
- 373 - Please Don't Litter
- 372 - Emergency Exit
- 371 - Restricted Area
- 370 - Restroom
- 369 - Wheels Must Be Chocked
- 368 - All Work Must Have A Work Odrder
- 367 - This Is Normal
Volume One: Trash and Abandonment
- 366 - Tie It Off*
- 365 - Unsense
- 364 - Medicated
- 363 - Grande
- 362 - There is No Blue Food
- 361 - Fauxna
- 360 - Appropriate Attire
- 359 - Not Technically Fraud
- 358 - Toughman*
- 357 - Checking In
- 356 - Cordless
- 355 - Reminder
- 354 - Kern
- 353 - Traveling
- 352 - Invadhair
- 351 - Broken Mold
- 350 - Gol!
- 349 - Light and Loose
- 348 - Dekindling
- 347 - Deadfall*
- 346 - Un Pipe
- 345 - Replaced
- 344 - Pokimortal
- 343 - Q And A
- 342 - Ahh, Sprong
- 341 - Mommy No
- 340 - Cost of Doing Business
- 339 - Office Gift
- 338 - Time for a Change
- 337 - Dove
- 336 - These Parts
- 335 - Untied
- 334 - The Body
- 333 - Channel
- 332 - Jingly
- 331 - Sage
- 330 - Download
- 329 - Turkey Day
- 328 - What the Actual
- 327 - Dunning-Kruger
- 326 - Mom
- 325 - June 10, 2007
- 324 - The Good Kind of Crash
- 323 - Fight the Power
- 322 - Spinnin'
- 321 - Like A Baby
- 320 - Anachronesia
- 319 - Weeeee!
- 318 - Merits of Aid
- 317 - Ballin'
- 316 - Glad(R)iator
- 315 - Dr.
- 314 - Doll
- 313 - One Moment
- 312 - Making Gains, Eating Brains
- 311 - Shop
- 310 - Hot Dongs
- 309 - Dumb Bets
- 308 - Red Velvet
- 307 - Was Wasting Money Part of Your Plan?
- 306 - Vocabulary
- 305 - Vigilantism
- 304 - Party Favor
- 303 - Fenceless
- 302 - Organic
- 301 - Mobility Fertility *
- 300 - Baby Got Feedback
- 299 - Innovator
- 298 - Every Day is Gym Day
- 297 - Instructions
- 296 - The Man From M.O.U.S.E.
- 295 - White Samurai
- 294 - Education
- 293 - All the Dicks of the Rainbow *
- 292 - Trivial
- 291 - Campaigning
- 290 - M.I.P.
- 289 - Sprayt to Video *
- 288 - Post-Op
- 287 - With A Grain
- 286 - Fixin's
- 285 - Jambalayman
- 284 - Wood
- 283 - Encounters
- 282 - Checkup
- 281 - Gib
- 280 - Apology!
- 279 - Wax On
- 278 - Prisoner
- 277 - Train From Baby
- 276 - Angling 264 - Company Policy
- 275 - Bogey
- 274 - The Neutral Zone
- 273 - Locally Sourced
- 272 - CBL
- 271 - When
- 270 - Which People Will You Contact Using the Telephone? *
- 269 - Trufer *
- 268 - Fan Fiction Fan Fiction
- 267 - Smuggle Struggle
- 266 - Ready to Eat
- 265 - It Looks All Funny
- 264 - Company Policy *
- 263 - Oh Yeah
- 262 - Bloody Sunday
- 261 - Pongo el Dinero en la Bolsa
- 260 - Lil' Racketeer
- 259 - Pointless Existence
- 258 - The Yellow Zone is for Fucking
- 257 - Under the Crust
- 256 - Follow-up *
- 255 - Sqwalor
- 254 - Cinemerica *
- 253 - Shamanship *
- 252 - Alternative Nutrition
- 251 - Marital Aid
- 250 - Reductive Parody *
- 249 - Cover It *
- 248 - "...and don't call me in the morning." *
- 247 - The Cajun, or Feed and Back Again *
- 246 - Grandma
- 245 - Do Not Eat
- 244 - Messy Eater
- 243 - The Water
- 242 - Eternal Dangnation *
- 241 - Novel
- 240 - Liq or Treat
- 239 - Defrost
- 238 - Backyard
- 237 - Depairs *
- 236 - Bring Back the Love
- 235 - Green Means Tuesday
- 234 - Working L8t
- 233 - Car Talk *
- 232 - Road Rage
- 231 - Power Dynamic
- 230 - Managerie
- 229 - Placeholder
- 228 - Roleplay
- 227 - Excuse Me
- 226 - Horiculture
- 225 - Shistory
- 224 - Hazard Pay
- 223 - Misprint
- 222 - Smuggles
- 221 - Booties
- 220 - Trash Animal
- 219 - Crime and Popishment
- 218 - Uh Modest Proposal
- 217 - Battleship Grey
- 216 - Lesspionage *
- 215 - It is Done *
- 214 - SCIENCE!
- 213 - UV
- 212 - Influence
- 211 - Suspicious Activity
- 210 - Chew on That
- 209 - Barhalla
- 208 - Santa
- 207 - Pod Life
- 206 - Elbow Pads
- 205 - Hookerella *
- 204 - Pursuit *
- 203 - Beautiful
- 202 - Try Everything Once
- 201 - Love Shack
- 200 - Everything But
- 199 - (c)Award *
- 198 - Wish
- 197 - Catty
- 196 - Gravy Boat House
- 195 - Huge
- 194 - Home Sweet Home
- 193 - More Car Trouble *
- 192 - Hot Shit *
- 191 - Rainbomb
- 190 - Wily *
- 189 - Truthseeker
- 188 - Path to Peace
- 187 - Slurver Star
- 186 - Braidcrumbs
- 185 - Alpha *
- 184 - The Man With No Name
- 183 - Lucifur
- 182 - Weekend Wars
- 181 - Volleyball Mom
- 180 - P.O.W.W. *
- 179 - Don't Play Angry
- 178 - Blackpaw Jack
- 177 - Nutting Up
- 176 - Underground
- 175 - I Want It
- 174 - Good Lcuk
- 173 - Fraternized
- 172 - Dat Wobble
- 171 - Sitting Bully *
- 170 - Eensty Rider
- 169 - Tackling Issues
- 168 - The Horror
- 167 - Opinion
- 166 - Ozymandias
- 165 - Improper Child Restraint
- 164 - Duel
- 163 - The Uhnth Dimension
- 162 - Monster
- 161 - Hardio *
- 160 - Worstday *
- 159 - STEMcess
- 158 - Line Break
- 157 - The Lazy Y
- 156 - Nuts
- 155 - Mascot
- 154 - Post-Artpocalyptic *
- 153 - Outside Day
- 152 - Meckanick *
- 151 - Rock Is Dead
- 150 - The Half of It *
- 149 - Clean Getaway
- 148 - Trouble Oh Seven
- 147 - The Feed Backs Again *
- 146 - Neigh
- 145 - Cuntfetti
- 144 - Driving Force
- 143 - Beef Beast
- 142 - Squashed
- 141 - Pogoblin *
- 140 - Fine Declining *
- 139 - Stuporvillain
- 138 - Divine
- 137 - I Knew That I Would
- 136 - Weenie Roast *
- 135 - And Eat It, Too
- 134 - The Man Who Drank Too Much *
- 133 - Sit Means Sit
- 132 - Whyambic
- 131 - Life, Lemons, etc.
- 130 - Crizzle Lizzle
- 129 - Rodentia
- 128 - Experience
- 127 - Scratch
- 126 - Getting Tired of It
- 125 - Thousand Beer Stare *
- 124 - Treats from Heaven
- 123 - #semiolife
- 122 - Click
- 121 - Pulp Poser
- 120 - Brütal *
- 119 - Robot Dating *
- 118 - Re: Tissues
- 117 - Bets
- 116 - More Feedback *
- 115 - Respectability
- 114 - Stand Up *
- 113 - Jerrerry
- 112 - Pet
- 111 - A Tale of Two Chairs
- 110 - Salesmanship
- 109 - Scrappin'
- 108 - Scratching Off the Truth
- 107 - Secrets
- 106 - Harassment *
- 105 - Longer Than Four Hours
- 104 - Sketchy
- 103 - Vidal Buffoon
- 102 - Manchild *
- 101 - Hitting the Bottle
- 100 - Mooch *
- 99 - Probing
- 98 - Conquest *
- 97 - Cheesy
- 96 - "Mom, I need a quarter!"
- 95 - Get. In.
- 94 - Spirit Expeditions
- 93 - Eureka!
- 92 - Sting
- 91 - A New Life
- 90 - Dig It
- 89 - Paper Trail
- 88 - Plastic Fantastic *
- 87 - Mom Science
- 86 - Descent
- 85 - A Few Good Hamsters
- 84 - 13:103(3)
- 83 - Cowboy Day
- 82 - Final Stop
- 81 - Hot Yoga
- 80 - Jumper
- 79 - American Dreams
- 78 - Quack
- 77 - Captive *
- 76 - Troll Stroll *
- 75 - Just Desserts
- 74 - Teen Mystery Club
- 73 - Snipe Hunt
- 72 - The One That Bot Away *
- 71 - Shopping
- 70 - Proctocality
- 69 - In Your Head
- 68 - Moo
- 67 - Father of the Fear
- 66 - Jesus Took the Wheel
- 65 - Jambaliar *
- 64 - Quitting
- 63 - Chew Before You Swallow Your Dreams
- 62 - METAL MADNESS
- 61 - Casual Friday
- 60 - Delusions of Sugar Plums
- 59 - War Games *
- 58 - Felinity
- 57 - Feedback *
- 56 - Chosen One *
- 55 - An Explanation
- 54 - Spread 'Em
- 53 - Cult *
- 52 - Hush Little Baby
- 51 - Price Tag
- 50 - How the Fuck Do You Spell 'Koozie'? *
- 49 - Suicide Fight
- 48 - A Moment of Love
- 47 - Love Robot *
- 46 - Tigerland *
- 45 - Thick as Thieves
- 44 - Practice Run
- 43 - Nursery Rhyme
- 42 - Buyer's Remorse
- 41 - Devil's Playground
- 40 - Lubricating Spray
- 39 - Berles
- 38 - What's in the Bag?
- 37 - Tuesday
- 36 - Unpacking
- 35 - Not Tonight
- 34 - Regularly Scheduled
- 33 - A Sound Observation
- 32 - Manic Pixie Dream Girl *
- 31 - Nitpick
- 30 - Drink it Down
- 29 - Enlightenment *
- 28 - Smelly Telly
- 27 - First Day *
- 26 - Death of Innocence Part II - Trainwreck
- 25 - Accomplishmeat
- 24 - The Ruins
- 23 - Cooping Mechanism
- 22 - Masonry
- 21 - Trespassing
- 20 - Rejected Bond Movies -Greenbreather
- 19 - Sitcom
- 18 - Your Death in His Words
- 17 - Tech Support
- 16 - Airsoft: Serious Business
- 15 - The Last Short Line out of Town
- 14 - Heirloom
- 13 - They Call Us the Bok Choyotes
- 12 - The Loser from the Black Lagoon
- 11 - As a Warning to the Others
- 10 - Death of Innocence, Birth of Madness
- 9 - Constructive Criticism
- 8 - Origin Story
- 7 - Crugslust
- 6 - Time Out for Sally
- 5 - Everyday Fender Bender
- 4 - Crawfish
- 3 - The Hero We Deserve
- 2 - A Most Noble Profession *
- 1 - It Was the End of an Era