“Daddy, can we get one of the free kittens?” asks your eight-year-old daughter with her puppy dog eyes in full effect.
“There’s no such thing as a free kitten, dear,” you explain impatiently. “First, someone has to pay the pit boss at the sex kitten ring for one of their free stud, then there’s steroids and various other hormones, top soil, Styrofoam insulation and closing costs. You really think they’re going to just eat all those fees, dear? No, they pass them on to you, the consumer, in the form of high-interest housing loans and sales taxes, and that is why the federal reserve should be dismantled.”
You daughter stares up at you with her mouth agape.
“So…can we?” she asks.